To-Do Lists

by Jennifer on May 31, 2012

“How did it get so late so soon? It’s night before it’s afternoon. December is here before it’s June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon?”   – Dr. Seuss

Things have been whirling by, leaving me frazzled and flustered and always two steps behind and two dollars short.

I know when I start to feel this way it means I have over-committed myself, always with the best of intentions but with regrettable results.  It usually means I have temporarily lost sight of why.

Why I jumped off the hamster wheel.

Why there are some days when being totally exhausted and being totally happy can coexist in perfect harmony.

Why there are some days when they do not.

I’ve struggled with holding myself back.  I know, through experience, that I have to make myself say “no”, and “that’s enough” even though my instinct is to say “Oh I can do that!  Let me take that over!”

At work there’s always a project that sounds interesting and I’m tempted to volunteer more of my time than I am able.  And even when I have the presence of mind to reign myself in, I do so with a sigh.

At my childrens’ schools, there is always something I think I could improve or some way I want to help out.  But I’m over-zealous.  And I often regret the commitments I make when I realize that, once again, there are not enough hours in a day.

It always comes from a good place.  But it ends up with me getting trapped in a bad place.

The place where the day has gone by and I’ve missed it all because my mind has been elsewhere.

The place where I am short-tempered because I am overwhelmed.

The place where I’m checking emails instead of playing with my little lovies.

The place where the day is over before it has even started and I haven’t managed to share a significant moment with either of them, or at least not one I can recall.

This is the bad place – where the irretrievable hours of a day in their lives have ticked by – and I haven’t enjoyed it with them.

So that’s where I have to stop.

I have to accept that others may be disappointed in me, that I may be frustrated with myself for not having eight arms and three brains, and that’s just going to have to be okay.

Because I won’t have them be disappointed in me.

kands To Do Lists

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
And I won’t live a life where the sun has set and the day is done before I’ve managed to take a few deep breaths and just absorb them.

Chubby baby skin must be smooshy kissed and enjoyed.

Little Boy hugs must be squeezed and cherished.

And that is all that HAS to be done today.

 

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

Robbie May 31, 2012 at 9:29 pm

I’m the same way. It’s not that I can’t say no to doing things it’s that i don’t want to. I want to do it all and i am always thinking of more things to do and then all of a sudden things fall apart b/c I’m doing so much.
glad you are taking time to hug, squeeze and cherish today.
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Galit Breen May 31, 2012 at 10:40 pm

Oh how I get this. I have such a hard time saying no but wowsa is it ever important, isn’t it?
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IASoupMama June 1, 2012 at 10:24 am

I have long decided that the ultimate super-power for a mom would be the ability to never need sleep. Then we could get everything done that we wanted to do, plus have some middle-of-the-night alone time when the world is peaceful. Failing that, I must always choose the kids before work/housework/other commitments. And the rest of the world is going to have to deal with it.

And those are some amazing faces to smoosh and kiss…
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Mamarific June 1, 2012 at 10:43 am

LOVE.
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Marta June 2, 2012 at 10:56 am

Yes, yes yes! I have the hardest time saying no. I hate disappointing anyone, and worst of all I hate the thought of missing something. An experience. An opportunity. Something.
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thedoseofreality June 2, 2012 at 11:19 am

Such a fantastic post. I related to ALL of it. Every single last bit. I took a year “off” (HA!) this year from saying yes and instead practiced saying no, and I have to tell you it was quite empowering. It was only because I was semi forced into after running a car raffle for my daughter’s school the year before. Yikes.
http://www.thedoseofreality.com/2011/09/16/volunteeritis-the-disease-to-please/
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Alexandra June 4, 2012 at 2:39 am

I can do so much more if I didn’t get sick from not sleeping.

xo

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